Once upon a time...
Looking at this boy, I never would have thought I'd ever have been rude to him. Marsden had dark brown hair, perfectly styled. His eyes were a piercing bright green. He had a beautiful smile and tan skin. I still couldn't wrap my head around the fact that I had once blown him off back when I was in school.
We were talking, being goofy. He was quite funny and that is something I want my prince charming to be. He was talking in different dialects for me. He was also being sarcastic, which if I wasn't the future queen of the land far far away, I'd be the queen of sarcasm. He was very thoughtful, much more than most guys. And he loved to write. He wrote poetry, which is kind of sexy. My mother thought we were a match made in heaven. My best friend also approved and they both said I needed to go out with him.
So when the fateful day came when he asked me out, I of course said yes.
Marsden wanted to take me to a show and then to a land a bit out of the way. I agreed under one condition: he had to get specific seats to the show. I described the seats and told him that I couldn't sit anywhere else. I had to sit there or I wouldn't go. I even drew him a picture and circled the section I had to sit in. Everyone I knew either thought I was being a bit rude or that it was funny. My mother asked if I was trying to create a fairytale about how long it took to lose a guy.
Everyone wanted to date a knight in shining armor. Well, I princess Brailee, dated a lot of losers in aluminum foil. Therefore, I didn't really want to date anymore. I decided if I went out, then I was going to get what I want. And if a guy couldn't handle me knowing exactly where I wanted to sit, then he wasn't worth dating.
Luckily, it didn't bother Marsden and I was quite thrilled that I got the seats I wanted. I wasn't thrilled however when he picked me up and didn't open my door to the carriage. Or to the theatre. Or any other doors we encountered. And I wasn't thrilled with how self centered he was. I would ask him simple questions, such as where are you working? Then he would go on for at least fifteen minutes about all the places he's worked, all the places he wanted to work, where he wanted to be working right now, where he almost got hired to work, and what he wanted to do in ten years as far as work goes. I'd have to repeat the question and ask, so you work where? So your favorite color is? So you like to read what exactly? It was bizarre.
Thank goodness we chose to see a show, because by the time we reached the theatre, I thought my brains were going to explode. And thank goodness the show was awesome. Because after that, the date got worse.
We were headed a different land because there were special decorations up on on of the streets in that land. It was actually a really cool place and I was looking forward to going. What should have been at most a twenty minute carriage ride, turned into an hour and a half. He could not find the street. He was getting frustrated. And I was getting bored. Finally, I just suggested he return me to the castle. He agreed and we headed back.
The castle came in to view and I breathed a huge sigh of relief. I was almost home. Thank goodness. Except, the carriage kept going, right past the castle. "Um Marsden, my home was that way," I said puzzled. "Oh I know, I want to stop at the store in town and get some snacks," he said. "Snacks? For what?" I asked. I was going home, he could get snacks after. "I don't know, some things just sound really good right now. You don't mind do you?" He said. I took a deep breath and told him I didn't. He took me to the show so I needed to be polite.
We reached the store and he got his snacks, not offering to get anything for me, the princess. On our way to pay for them, we walked by a few overweight citizens. "I have no compassion for overweight people," Marsden began. I almost choked on my breath. I stared at him stunned. "Why not?" I asked. "I used to be overweight. After I changed my diet and worked out a bit I lost all the weight," he explained. "Shouldn't that make you more compassionate on those poeple since you know what they're going through?" We had exited the store at this point and were climbing in to the carriage. Again, he didn't open my door. "No, I know that the only reason they're overweight is because they aren't trying hard enough to be healthy."
I was speechless. All manners went out the door after that comment. "So you're kind of shallow then?" I asked bluntly. He paused for a second. "Some say I'm shallow, but at least I'm getting my feet wet." I just stared at him. He continued, "Wow that line was good right? I'm going to have to write that one down to incorporate in to a poem." I stopped looking at him and stared out the window, wanting to be safe in my castle doors where the soldiers could beat him up if he came close to me.
We finally reached the castle and he caught me offguard when he walked me to the door. I thought he didn't have a single bone of a gentleman in his body. Apparently he did. It had to be the smallest bone in his body, but it was still there. When we said goodnight, he leaned in to kiss me. I turned my head and hugged him instead, thanked him for the date, and hurried inside. I had been mistaken. There definitely wasn't a bone of a gentleman in his body. He had alterior motives when walking me to the door rather than doing it to be polite.
When the door shut behind me, I started to cry. My parents and little sister heard me and walked to the door to see how the night went. They were a little stunned when they saw me in tears. "What happened!?" they all exclaimed. I just walked by them and said, "I'm never going on another date again."
This is where the story should have ended.
However, shallow poet Marsden didn't think the date went remotely wrong. He thought it was fantastic and that I was the kind of person he wanted to spend more time around, because I made him feel good. "When are you free this week to go out again?" he asked me when he saw me a few days later. "This week is actually really busy," I responded truthfully. He shook his head, "Oh I didn't mean this week, I meant next week." Right he did. "Ask me the beginning of next week. We are supposed to have some guests visiting from out of town so I may not be able to, but I'm not totally positive that they're coming."
He forgot that I said to ask the next week, because I received a letter from him two days later asking when he could see me. I wanted to beat my head on a door and take back the first date. I didn't respond to his letter, which deeply upset him.
When I was in town, he saw me and ran up to me to confront me. "Don't worry about getting back to me, I've gotten the hint," he said rudely. "Gotten back to you about what?" I asked. "About when you're free to go out," he replied. "I told you already that I wasn't." He paused and thought. "Sorry for bringing it up then," he said, unapologetically. "It's not a problem to bring it up, it's how you brought it up," I lectured. "I agree it wasn't the best way. I just have had this stuff happen before and I don't like having my time wasted." Oh my, I thought to myself. I took a deep breath. "We went on one date Marsden. How am I wasting your time? You're thinking way too much into it," I then began to walk away.
He stopped me. "Well I'm not going to waste my time asking anyone to go out if they don't want to," he said. "I am a princess. I have a lot of responsibilities and duties. I'm busy. If that bothers you then don't ask," I said. "It's good for one to remain busy. It doesn't bother me. I will see you around," then he bowed and walked away. Did he say it's good for ONE to remain busy?? Weird.
I thought I'd gotten rid of the strange shallow poet when he approached me yet again, a couple weeks later. This time he wanted to take me to a jousting match. With his dad. I was bewildered. I had only gone out with him once, I was not ready to meet his family. Let alone to play third wheel to him and his father, or have his father play third wheel to me and him. I politely declined. Not just for this date, but for all future ones as well.
And we lived happily never after.
